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January 30, 2009



Mike, your tearin' me up today.
Funny how some ailments have their own measurements, like a touch of a cold.
There ought to be a splash of the clap, I suppose, or a pinch of Parkinsons.
Or a bale of insanity.
That'd bout do it.


There aren't too many words that get under my skin per se. I'm more sensitive to nouns used as verbs and expressions like, "And at the end of the day." Generally I find the combination of the two = bullshit.

UF Mike

A "splash of the clap." That sounds reeeeellly unpleasant. Kinda like a dash of dengue fever. Or: "It's nothing, old chap. Just a spot of Ebola. You'll be bleeding from the eyes in no time."

Ben, I guess I used to work with said, "From soups to nuts" regularly. Too regularly. He also used to say, no shit, "How will that play in Peoria?" His name was Cliff and he had those big thick glasses that make the wearer's eyes look like like eggs sunnyside up.


Gives a whole new meaning to "4-Finger Bag"


I hope the cancer is rendered null and void quickly. Because what would I do without my daily dose of the ADD essayist?

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