Starting Next Week

We'll be writing this blog from the top of Mt. Olympus.

That's right: we've been Godded.

We've got to tell you, it was a surprise.  When we saw the letter in the mail, frankly we thought it was a joke.  But no, it was for real, which just goes to show you that sending in those little fake paper coins that come inside Mallo Cups can pay off.

We'll have a probationary period, of course.  We won't be able to control the weather or hurl any thunderbolts or anything.  And we're starting off pretty low as God of Organized Brown Bag Lunches.  We know, it doesn't sound like much.  But we'll be the guy responsible for striking down people who snatch other people's lunchbags from the breakroom refrigerator.

One of the best things about being Godded is you get comprehensive dental.  If that isn't godlike, we don't know what is.  We'll also have use of a small cottage about a hammer's throw from Thor's place.  It's nice and would be nicer if it weren't for all the brown patches on the lawn from the nymphs and centaurs who can't be bothered to use the conveniently located Jiffy John.

We're not sure about the dress code.  The job could well require horns.  Or hooves even.  We hope there's Casual Friday.  We have always wanted to see Pan in a polo shirt.

Comments

[Marianne]

Say hi to Zeus for me and tell him I want my tail back. Please. And tell him I'm sorry for eating his lunch. It will never happen again.

[Daniel]

oh the things hidden in a plain brown paper bag, but the best is the impregnate milk maids get of jail free card, there's no child support to pay, just some holographic larger than life floating head guidance once in a while, "I am Kal-El. No I'm kidding, I'm your father. Fire is hot. TTFN." [Fade to Blur], and what is your godded name? i'm torn between UF-oclese and UF-trius...

[Unremitting Mike]

Marianne: We shall. And we will. And all we can say is, you're lucky we weren't Brown Bag God when this "incident" occurred.

Sorry to disappoint, Daniel, but our godded name is Hagar. Sammy Hagar.

[Dave Mows Grass]

Congratulations! You've just landed yourself a whole lot more work. Striking down lunchroom bandits is a hard job. If you do well, they'll start tacking on a bunch of other responsibilities like exposing pantyfaxers or catching the Phantom Shitter. Be careful what you ask for with those Mallo Cups!

[Karindira]

I think the minor gods go nude, which in your case if JUST FINE (based on photographic evidence).

[UF]

You flatterer you! As mom always says, "Flattery will get you everywhere."