We won't be going. Enforced conversation over pizza doesn't seem like a good time to us. We have one coworker who starts every conversation with the words "I used to be a Marine," another who has a beard and wears sweaters that make him look like he just teleported in from a lobster boat in Maine, and another who hasn't spoken a word in 16 years. Say something to her and she responds with an eerie giggle that makes you think she has a bunny rabbit boiling away in a pot on the stove at home. We suspect it has something to do with the fact that most of us are editors, who are a poorly socialized lot on the whole, very withdrawn and prone to fantasies of taking high-powered rifles to rooftops and shooting innocent passersby. We're not meant to collect in one place and have a good time. We're meant to lean over solitary manuscripts, and then go home to our spouses/love dolls. The silence at our office parties is deafening. Everyone eats their pizza, and nervously eyes the person sitting next to them, and calculates in their head how much they're saving on lunch. We'd sooner spend the money on lunch, and eat it alone at our desk, while silently calculating in our head how much money we just wasted on lunch.
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November 30, 2011
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I like this one! I laughed out loud at the /love doll part. I would put "teleported in from a fishing pier in Maine" thtas just me. Maine seems a little flat. hell it could be a lobster house in maine as well.
Posted by: karoline | November 30, 2011 at 06:06 PM
I like both your suggestions. In fact, I intend to steal one of them. Thanks Karoline!
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