Yesterday in the Gym

There was a woman running on the treadmill with her mouth open.  Like wide, jaws stretched, open.  She looked like a sea fish scooping up plankton.  Or like us, as when frequently happens, we hear something that flabbergasts us, and we go all slack-jawed and look like a retarded person.  Anyway, obviously the woman has the right to run on the treadmill any way she wants.  If she wants to imitate a goldfish, that's her business.  It's not for us to mock her.  Especially since we frequently leap up to the pull up bar only to suddenly suffer the delusion that we're hanging 75 feet off the ground.  We hang on as long as we can, and let loose a scream of despair when we finally let go.  Imagine our relief when we abruptly land nine inches later.  We've been asked to stop this behavior, even threatened with expulsion.  This seems unfair to us.  Is it our fault if we have difficulty gauging heights?  And that the gym workers won't call the firemen with the net, even when we beg them to?  

Comments

[Jan Martin Löhndorf]

That thing about the firemen really made me laugh!

Also, the word "blowfish" came to my mind, but that's naughty, sorry 'bout that.

I guess I am going to give Hunter S. Thompson a try, one day soon. I like him for having his ashes being blown into the air with a giant gonzo cannon.

And everybody read Paul Lafargue's "Thge Right to be Lazy", it's as native New English as can be! All hail Mrs. Neutron, the Red Indians and all the unemployed wherever you are!

(Got a bit carried away here, sorry 'bot that as well ...)

[UF MIKE]

No need to apologize, my friend. You really should read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, it's hilarious. One of the funniest books ever written. As for the blowfish, she did have that going on, except she was skinny, extremely skinny...

[Martijn]

Was she on the cover of Trout Mask Replica? Hê hê... lame one, innit? The most baffling part about the Trout Mask cover is that it is not even a trout but a catfish.

Yes, I loved 'Fear & Loathing' too. Right Up there!

Now, daylight waning again and another doomfilled day comes to a sober end. I'm rooting for you todat Mike. 'Government Deadwood' sounds like the absolute perfect job for you, as well as for me. I'll think about you.

[Jan Martin Löhndorf]

Guess she was from Innsmouth rather ... höhö

[bannedfrommikes]

A friend of mine had a groundskeeping job at LSU back in about 1977 or so. Hunter Thompson came and gave a lecture there. Allen, my friend, he had a wore out paperback copy of "Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail" that was so wore out he had to keep it in a Ziplock plastic bag. binding was gone, pages were missing and falling out, ect. Anyway, he brings it to the school and manages to catch Thompson going into the Lecture Hall to try to get an autograph. Allen hands him the Ziplock and Thompson pulls the cover out and as he is signing it looks over the tops of his glasses and says to Allen:
"You ought to be arrested for this you know."
Can you imagine? I wish I had a story like that!

[Jeffers]

Happy Birthday!!!!

[bannedfrommikes]

Happy birthday? Is it that time of year again? Hi Mike!

[Jan Martin Löhndorf]

all the best to you, Mike!

[UF MIKE]

Thanks everybody! You all ought to be arrested for this, you know!

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