Everything we know about sex is wrong. We were lied to. Carrot Top lied to us!
Sex is about intimacy. And closeness. Sex is not lust; it's a naked exchange of souls giving and receiving erotic pleasure in a spirit of unconditional love. So take off your armor! And put on your three-pronged dildo hat.
Sex should not hurt. If it does, try nudging the rhinoceros.
You cannot fill that "hole in your soul" with sex. Sex is not a toy. Well, it could be a toy. Although if it's longer than 20 inches, legally it's a deadly weapon.
From personal experience, we can tell you never to buy a personal lubricant billed as "extra dry."
Also from personal experience: Never have sex with anyone you picked up at an England Dan and John Ford Coley concert. Especially if its England Dan.