We've Decided We're Adopted

That's right. 

It's a hard belief to maintain, especially since we look just like our dad and act just like our mom, but we're standing by it. 

We plan to spend next week searching for our biological parents.  We've decided they live in Topeka.  We intend to go door to door in that fair city, asking people if they're missing an adult kid.

What we're hoping for, of course, is a tearful reunion and reconciliation followed by demands by us for a large cash settlement.  We plan to point out to mom and dad that they were spared the lifetime of outrageous aggravation and suffering we doled out to our ersatz parents.

For some reason we're sure our real dad works in heating, ventilation, and air conditioning.  Our first inkling that something wasn't right with our "adoptive" family was that "Dad" worked with natural gas.  Don't ask us how, but we just knew this was "wrong."  No way our real father wasn't in HVAC.

Our other clue stemmed from our mother's participation in the antiques trade.  We hate antiques, or at least the old ones.

We will keep you up to date on our search for our missing past.  We will also keep you up to date on our missing future.