People often ask us, "Unremitting Failure, how do you keep your butt cheeks so supple?" The answer is simple: we apply a thin coating of liverwurst before bed. It beautifies, and also keeps the dogs busy.
It was de rigeur in the rarefied, hothouse atmosphere of Littlestown seventies haute couture. To appear in a pair of ankle-length sweat socks would have guaranteed you a smackdown on any Littlestown basketball court or fashion runway. As you can see from Barbra, this wasn't some backwoods whim; it was a sartorial diktat handed down by the invisible lever-pullers of Carter-era style. And as for wearing noncaucasian socks with shorts, it would have been nothing less than fashion suicide, and a sure fire way of finding yourself hanging out with such schoolyard untouchables as Ron Stout and Dave Creel. The kids, come to think about, we did hang out with.
Is the rear end, or "caboose", of Barbra Streisand, as depicted on the back of her critically acclaimed, double-platinum Superman LP of 1977. It isn't often one is treated to a view of the ass cheeks of a singing legend--we've yet to see Neil Diamond's* butt moons, unless we've repressed the memory--so enjoy it. As some may remember, Superman put the "me in the "Me Decade," featuring as it did songs called "My Heart Belongs to Me", "Lullaby for Myself" and "Baby Me Baby."
Neil and Barbra sang together in the Erasmus Hall High School choir in Brooklyn. No shit.
Here Barbra Streisand wears her athletic socks in true seventies fashion, i.e., to the brink of the knees. From afar, Lynyrd Skynyrd drummer Artimus Pyle is consumed by the flames of lust as her gazes upon Barbra with long-socked desire. Had they coupled, they would undoubtedly have produced children with long, beautiful white athletic socks.
About a world where everyone wears identical suits made out of bubble wrap. When the last bubble in your bubble wrap outfit pops, you die. And everyone goes around trying to pop each other's little suit bubbles out of sheer futuristic spite.